"Idol"-ing Away This Evening

Tonight was the first night of "American Idol". I rather much like the audition episodes, they are in many ways more entertaining than the show proper. And so far, this season hasn't disappointed any in the cheap entertainment department.

And now, my list of what I consider to be the highlights of the low-lights:

• Alaa: Mr. "Love 'Em from the Hair to the Nipple". WTF?
• The "Go Down Moses" guy: Enunciation? Just say "no"!
• Nick Stano: Please leave "Unchained Melody" to the pros. Don't try this at home.
• ZhengZhong: Zzzzzzzzzzz
• Udgeet: Another WTF?
• Alexis: Pillar of maturity that you are... not! Oh, grow up!
• Milo: Looks like Peter Yarrow, sounds like Billy Crystal. 'Nuff said...
• Ben: What the Flaming Hell was that? Ewwww! And what's with the waxing - dude, that is just plain not right, not to mention against the laws of nature. No self-respecting guy does that. Then again, Ben, you're clearly no self-respecting guy...
• Paul the Stalker: Ahhh... Security?
• Cristina: Princess Leia in hot pants, fishnet stockings, and leather boots. Mommy, I'm scared!

I daresay that's enough "entertainment" for one night. I used to like "I Love Rock and Roll"...

(Patti suggested that I should at least make mention of some of the more touching moments. Oh puh-leeze! Save it for Oprah...)

Until Chewbacca yodels again...